Made in Charlotte

Well, I'm back.  Sort of.  I've been on a hiatus of sorts - trying to get rid of these wicked, wicked headaches.  I've asked for advice and tried it all, but unfortunately, these nasty things are caused by me, myself and I - not hormones.  I have numerous musculoskeletal issues that resulted from a few surgeries about four years ago.  When you add those to hyper mobile joints and strong muscles, you get issues and evil headaches.

Dr. Matt has been at the center of my universe followed VERY closely by DD and her 'evil' yet healing massage hands.  Between the two of them, I'm able to see straight for now but still need to get a good night's sleep.  

Baby McG is thriving - thank goodness - I guess this is my first "mommy" lesson - I feel horrible, but the baby feels great - that's all that matters! Suffering is all part of the deal! :)

So I'm here...I'm fighting through the fog and dreaming about Advil and chewing food again.  But until I get 'on top' of the headaches, chewing isn't in my future.  I've been released from the amazing fertility clinic we've been going to for years - it was so sad and yet such a happy moment. 

It is always their goal to release their patients to our regular docs for further prenatal care, but it's bittersweet to leave that amazing support network behind.  There were tears and hugs and they gave us the sweetest onesie that says "Made in Charlotte" on the front - our first baby clothes gift.  We love it - it's surreal for now.  I guess it will feel more real when I start to see a 'regular' doctor and the ultrasounds change from weekly to monthly - OY!  Team McGowan is morphing!

I'm in the middle of week 11 - Baby McG is almost the size of a lime - but according to the doctor, "it's a long one!"  Uh oh.  Where on Earth will I put a long baby???  Looks like I'll be carrying a pretzel soon!  Poor kid - let's hope he/she stops getting longer and just starts to fill in!    God did not give me a normal sized upper body - in fact I'm so short wasted that petite shirts are long on me....should be an interesting time!

For now, my focus is on work and getting through some really interesting projects.  I'm swimming in a sea of bureaucracy right now - luckily I'm a strong swimmer.  I'm hoping this too shall pass and good things will come with this new job.  It's interesting and requires out of the box thinking - nice for a change!

I hope you're all doing well!
Happy Monday Ya'll!

One Mack Daddy Crack

Wow.  What a wacky weekend.  It was a blur....after seeing Dr. Matt this morning, I now understand why.  My people, my body is adapting all too well to this baby thing.  So well in fact, that my neck decided to slide to the left side - all of it.  That was causing my monster headache that would never go away and caused my entire weekend to be nothing but a blur. 

He did one mack daddy crack - a cranial sacral pull -and wham.  My whole spine cracked in response.  I heard it and felt it all the way to my tailbone.  Sweet mercy.  Needless to say, going forward, I will now be seeing Dr. Matt twice a week.  None of this tough guy, I only need him once in a while business. 

Pain has a whole new definition when you're having a baby I've learned.  No popping Advil.  No heating pads.  No hot baths.  All of my vices are off limits.  So the chronic pain that I've had for years now is magnified to the nth degree.  Add in hyper,loose joints and I'm a human rubber band who pops things as a hobby.  Good times.

At least we know that the headache was due to a mechanical problem and not hormones.  There's that at least.

I'm waiting for the magic day that everyone has told me about....the day I wake up and feel GREAT!  Energized even!  I'll be content with an afternoon like that - seriously.  A great night's sleep would be good too. 

I did breakdown and buy a maternity pillow today - I'm praying that it works - if it doesn't, the Bubbies will have a really expensive new bed to fight over!

So for now, I'm still fighting the vestiges of a slight headache and although it was fun to see L & L for a short while this weekend - it wasn't nearly long enough!  Can't wait to see the whole H clan and soon!!!

For now, good luck to all with the 'back to school' traditions going on this month and I hope that everyone loves their new teachers!  Don't let the homework break you! :)

Happy Monday Ya'll!

Hey, I Look Good in Green

I’m alive.  Barely, but I’m here.  Sorry I’ve been offline for a while.  I tried the Zofran, it worked really well to curb the nausea and I felt like new!  Woohoo!  Unfortunately, I ended up with some bad side effects while taking it and can no longer enjoy nausea-free days.  Boo….

For the past three days, I’ve been a useless vegetable.  Seriously, I didn’t do a darn thing from Friday through Sunday.  I felt so sick I couldn’t move without spinning.

Cue Dr. Matt...

I got up this morning determined to make the best of today – mind over matter – you know how that works right?  I can do this!  Luckily I had an appointment with Dr. Matt this morning – purely coincidence.  He took one look at me and said, ”What’s bothering you the most.”  I told him to take a pick – I was in agony from the shoulders up to my neck.

He started low and worked his way up – it was at about 10 ‘cracks’ that he reached my neck.  Under my ears is a truly sensitive spot for me.    It has been for about 15 years now – I haven’t even been able to touch those spots…well, he felt up and down my neck and said, “Well, I would bet that you don’t feel well at all today.” 

Hmmm…was it the pale, greenish tonal quality to my skin?  Perhaps it was the sweat I broke into when I had to walk from my car into the building?    Maybe it was the way I was sucking down my Body by Vi shake this morning – like a lifeline….maybe he heard the prayers I was muttering under my breath.

Turns out, it had nothing to do with my gorgeous façade (read sarcasm) – it was the fact that the axis bone at the top of my neck was completely sideways and out of joint.  (Note, the axis bone is the second cervical vertebra in the spinal column. It allows the head and neck to rotate or turn and shake.)   THAT’s why my neck hurt when I turned it. Well Duh.  Apparently it was also making me extremely dizzy and nauseous. 

So, I’m still dealing with the nausea, but at a much lower level and all of the evil side effects of the Zofran have hopefully gone away.  And hey, I can touch under my ears like a normal person again - not that normal people do that often.  It's the principle of the thing my people! 

I’m here….I’m walking more evenly and able to hold my head up – so that’s half the game! I'm no longer green, but since that's a great color for me, I was ok with it for a while.   I’m learning more and more about my new job and I’m actually looking forward to it!  Still don’t know what my title is and what my exact responsibilities are, but we’ll get there in time I guess.

I hope you all had a wonderful weekend and that you are having a great Monday too!

Happy Monday Ya’ll!

Uh Oh, I Broke Dr. Matt

Well, the deal is done - the company is sold and we are officially branded with a new identity.  We still don't have jobs or bosses,  but hey, why sweat the small stuff right? :)

I saw Dr. Matt this morning after I realized that turning my neck wasn't going to work out for me without help...that was because I'd popped a rib out apparently...go crazy.  Who knew you could do that while sitting at a desk?  The scary thing is though, that while Dr. Matt was fixing my popped out rib, he popped out his own!  Oops...is that a chiropractic foul?  I wonder if he'll bill me for his next chiropractic treatment along with mine?  Geeze...I didn't mean to hurt him!

Well, while he was nursing his side, we were chatting about a restaurant in Marietta, GA (where he went to school) that has a meal that is supposed to make you go into labor - the restaurant is called Scalini's.  They have over 300 baby pictures lining their walls and all of the babies were born shortly after eating their restaurant’s eggplant Parmesan dish.  I knew about this place when I lived in Atlanta, but it was so funny to go down memory lane and remember...their garlic rolls were 'to die for' delicious!

SO why am I bringing this up?  I think now that Pedro is letting me eat - I've become obsessed with food.  It's a love/hate relationship and honestly, I'm alternating between starving and nauseous.  Have you ever noticed that when people talk to pregnant women, they discuss food, cravings and favorites?  When's the last time you were asked if you had any cravings if you weren't pregnant?  Who cares really?  There's just such an obsession with the odd mix of foods that women crave when they are pregnant.  It makes me laugh!

I'm fascinated by the correlation between pregnancy and food.  I always thought I would eat such a healthy diet and never binge on things that were bad for me if I got pregnant.  HA!  I had french fries for lunch today.  Nothing else - just fries.  That's what Pedro wanted.    I was going to have pickles too, but showed some restraint with the salt - I was proud of myself.  The lunch I had planned made me gag.

All he had to eat today was Corn Chex, M&Ms (just a few) and french fries - that is until I went to Dairy Queen and had small Reese's Blizzard - hey it helped charity and had dairy in it - don't judge me!  I tried to fix it at dinner tonight - Pedro wanted meat - thank goodness, so I actually had a meal.  I had a small steak, a salad and a baked potato.  FOOD!  I ate like a grown-up!  I ate a vegetable!

Goodness knows what tomorrow will bring.  I'll be sure to bring my bag of Corn Chex though because Pedro sure is fickle!  (He must be a she the way he changes his mind!)  The one thing I know I'll avoid is the eggplant parm at Scalini's in Marietta! :o)

Happy Friday Ya'll!

Monday Was Just a Write-Off

What to do when you have nothing (or not much) to do?  That’s my current dilemma.  I’m in limbo as I expected and really wish I had a huge project to work on, but right now, that’s not the case.  So as I sit in my new office location – at my new wobbly desk – with my new phone that no one can figure out, I try to find things to do.

Obviously, we’ve moved into our new office location.  We’re in the other building and boy oh boy is it warm and humid.  I actually brought a fan in with me to help with the stifling heat that almost took me out yesterday.  No lie.  It is just sickening in here.

Yesterday was a really rough day for me.  I woke up sicker than I’ve been at all – so miserable I didn’t make it into work until about 9:30AM….it took me three hours to feel like I could actually take a shower and get ready – driving was a joy.

Here are some fun highlights of my day Monday:

1.       Woke up gagging.

2.       Got to work about 2 hours after my co-workers to move into our new cubicles.

3.       Found out my desk shakes when I type – so my monitor gives me the motion sickness gags.

4.       I walked with some friends over to our old building to have lunch in the 95 degree weather.   As soon as I entered the old building, my heel broke off of my favorite shoes.  They’re toast.

5.       I heated my lunch, sat down to eat and gagged.  Closed lunch and sat for a minute with the group and then had to leave because the smells of their lunches was too much.

6.       I walked back to the new building solo.  Water was more than I could handle yesterday.

7.       I limped the rest of the day.

8.       I had a cup of Corn Chex and popcorn to eat all day - that’s it.

9.       I spilled my ice coffee from Starbucks all over the back of my car when I went to leave work.

10.   Went to the chiropractor (yay Dr. Matt) – that was a highlight – but my back and neck were so bad I had to lie on ice for about 30 minutes.  Ouch.

Don’t get me wrong, there were some highlights to yesterday – the chiropractor helped me immensely.  I feel better – slept well last night and had yoga with my friend K.  She calmed me down the rest of the way after a really crappy day.  Yay YogaMe!!

Today, I’m equipped with my fan, my psi wristbands, a calmer stomach and a hope that this will turn out to be a great week!

Happy Tuesday Ya’ll!

And the Beat Goes On

Ok, so let's recap the last few of my posts - we went through fertility treatments, we waited and waited and waited, we found out we were pregnant (yay!), and I claimed it.  Obviously I'm a very silly girl because all I focused on was the actual 'getting pregnant' part of the whole picture.  So now that I'm pregnant, I'm back in the vicious loop of waiting, claiming, waiting and claiming. 

Today was a rough day for me. I'm totally ramped up about work - things are happening that one day I'll share; but right now it's a bit stressful to think about.  I'm not really happy at work right now but I need to have a job without B working.  SO I need to suck it up and put it away until I have no choice but to deal with it.  That might be two weeks from now actually.  At least I hope it is.

I woke up this morning and realized I didn't feel pregnant.  OH MY GOD.  I was ready to run screaming through the house - instead I asked for a hug.  It helped.  I thought I had that under control, but obviously I didn't. 

But I still had to go to work - after a quick visit to Dr. Matt - who still cracks me up by the way - so I went to work, practicing my yoga breathing - go Team McGowan! - it helped somewhat, but then the work stuff started and boy was I a wreck.  I got so upset today that I couldn't stay calm, my heart was just racing and then I noticed that I was feeling  really 'different.' Scary different.

I just wanted to turn tail and go home and crawl in bed and pray that everything would be ok.   I stuck it out though, talked with my boss and settled a few things and after a few hours of being calm, began to feel pregnant again.  I know I sound crazy ya'll - but I'm really scared right now.  I know I'm supposed to be  - but boy, after miscarrying 3 years ago, I'm second guessing every little twinge - praying that things are still copacetic.

So for now, I'm going to continue breathing deeply and hope that tomorrow's blood work is great - work can just continue to stay in the background for a while I think.  Baby McGowan's still so much more important - I'll just keep focusing on positive thoughts....

Fingers are crossed until tomorrow.....for now we're enjoying some cuddle time with our Bubbies, I'm curled up with my favorite afghan and Sabrina's on television - ok it's the remake of Sabrina, but any sappy chick flick in a pinch right?  And the beat goes on....(Sonny and Cher's version mind you.)  One day down many more to go!

Happy Thursday Ya'll!